Corruptus In Extremus

JCUMSA, the elite snobby society for med-students only, recently held some elections to nominate their future executive members. Now i know what you're thinking: "Democracy? In Medicine? Sure, and Keith Urban will be sober now that he's with Nicole", but it's true! Rather than relying on someone's noble birthright or a detailed examination of a person's geneology to see who has the most doctors in their family tree, they actually vote on who they want to be running JCUMSA. Surprise of all surprises, I was elected as Year Representative! So I am now the voice of all my fellow med buddies next year, taking over the role from Sharad.

Well, when I say surprise, it probably wasn't, given the amount of bribery/pushing/shoving/ calling in favours i did on Tuesday. Sharad, Andrew and I discovered that i had a huge number of people willing to vote for me, but that few of them were willing to turn up to vote. In response to this, we bought and distributed a huge number of Starburst lollies, tutored an extensive number of people in the muscles of the leg, reminded home group 3 of the fact that I have saved their collective behinds on several occasions, noted that it was my birthday in a week, tore down other people's campaign posters, and generally annoyed/tortured people until they agreed to turn up and vote. It worked! I got the position, by a landslide.

The moral of the story is that corruption will always triumph over democracy. Just look at the Bush Administration.

I would also like to point out that the string of corruption shall not stop there. The students at St. Mark's shall receive preferential treatment over all others, with certain exceptions. Especially if they keep bribing me with their brilliant tea.

Now, off to assassinate some opposition and deny any knowledge of scandals! Huzzah for Politics!